


Definitely Not Single

by knockoutqueenoftheunderworld



Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Judy my darling dear, M/M, Misunderstandings, Nick is so smitten oh my g o d, Pining, Snippets, timestamps
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-21
Updated: 2016-03-27
Packaged: 2018-05-28 03:16:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6313255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knockoutqueenoftheunderworld/pseuds/knockoutqueenoftheunderworld
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bits of the life of Clawhauser and his husband Serge.<br/>Prequel to <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/6189277">Technically Single</a>, first chapter can be read as a standalone.<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In Which Nick & Judy Find Out

It was another day at the station. Lunchtime, and Judy had been working overtime.

“As usual,” Nick retorted, leaning over her shoulder to look at her computer. A crime ring stealing rare books, and they'd only left one clue behind—a broken monocle with an embedded emerald where the chain should go.

“How pretentious.”

“I don't need you narrating everything I do,” Judy sighed, but she was smiling.

“I'm hungry,” Nick coaxed, prodding her neck with his snout. Judy shoved him away. Nick had the grace to be embarrassed. He forgot they weren't actually together, sometimes. “Take me out, Carrots.”

“Give me five minutes.”

“You said _that_ ten minutes ago. Do I need to pick you up and carry you?”

“Nick, _not now_.”

Nick let his ears droop and his smile fall away. He let himself appear to revert back to his old self, the guarded, resigned fox he used to be.

Judy picked up on it immediately. Her nose twitched and she frowned, looking at him with concern. He didn't meet her eyes. “Oh, alright,” she said softly, saving her work and closing the program.

Nick smirked. “You can't resist me.”

Judy rolled her eyes but didn't deny anything.

He knew it!

“So, I figure, we could go to this place in Tundra Town…” Nick began, leading her out the door and into the tall opening room to ZPD. “They have a vegetarian menu available, and I have always adored their salmon with blueberry sauce…” Not to mention the candlelight and romantic atmosphere.

“Sounds great,” Judy replied, sitting up a little straighter. She obviously wanted to be finishing up her report, but the dusty books and shiny jewels could wait. Clearly the idea of getting out of her monochrome office was becoming more appealing.

“Do you wanna walk or take the subway?” Nick asked, checking the weather on his phone.

“Hm… walk,” Judy said. Then her ears perked in interest. “Who’s that?” Nick looked up.

A tiger had just slipped through the doors. It took Nick a second to realize he was a tiger; his stripes were the thickest he had ever seen on one of them, making his fur appear almost entirely a sleek black. He was clad in a bright blue jumpsuit with black boots, a pair of sunglasses rested on his head.

“I don't know,” Nick replied. The tiger approached Clawhauser's desk. The cheetah was busy rummaging furiously through one of his desk drawers. He only halted his efforts when the tiger cleared his throat.

“Hello, welcome to the ZPD–” Clawhauser looked up and gasped audibly. “Serge!”

The tiger smiled toothily. “Hey, Ben.”

“What are you doing here?” Clawhauser demanded, tail flicking back and forth and ears pushed forward in pleasure. He had a little smile on his face that crinkled his nose slightly; he reserved that one for those he liked the most.

The tiger, apparently Serge, leaned forward into Clawhauser's space. “I, uh, got an extended lunch break. Thought I'd come visit you.”

“Awww, that's so nice of him!” Judy said to Nick. “They must be really good friends!”

No kidding. Nick smiled at his partner as she tapped the ground impatiently.

“Oh, I love when you do this,” Clawhauser sighed, chin in paw. Then he perked up, spine straight. “Let me talk to the chief, see if he'll let me off the hook for a few hours—” He was already out of his chair and around the desk. “I’ll be right back!” He nearly sang as he strode away. Serge watched him leave fondly. Nick idly observed the whole deal, feeling his mouth twitching into his default smirk.

A sudden, sharp tug on his tie startled him and he was at eye level to his lovely partner's purple eyes. “Should we go meet him?” she hissed. “I want to meet him!” She jerked her head toward the tiger, who leaned casually against the desk like he belonged there.

“Why, Carrots?” Nick asked. He had a date with Ju– er, blueberry sauce on salmon. A date with salmon smothered with blueberry sauce. Right. He tried not to let on how his breathing grew heavy with their faces so close to each other.

“Because he seems nice,” Judy responded as Serge gave a playful salute to Officer Fangmier as he passed by. She released Nick then, and he could start breathing normally again. “And I love meeting people. It's good to have connections. And he's obviously important to Clawhauser.”

Nick sighed, fighting the affection that swelled within him at her words. “I’d make a quip about bunnies, but I think you're on the dot with this one.”

Clawhauser ambled back to the desk from the direction of Chief Bogo's office, beaming. Judy leapt over to them, Nick following behind at a much calmer pace. Judy hadn't yet grasped the concept of _cool_.

“Hi!” she greeted pleasantly.

“Hey Judy!” Clawhauser looked absolutely delighted at seeing her. However, his eyes strayed to Serge repeatedly as he asked, “How are you?”

“Fantastic, and yourself?”

Clawhauser's gaze met Serge's, and something in his eyes warmed and glowed and bubbled beneath the surface, and realization dawned as Nick saw the same look reflected in Serge's eyes. “Just great,” he breathed, and oh God, Nick was going to get _so many_ cavities.

“Who’s this?” Judy prompted when Clawhauser didn't look away from Serge.

“Oh, Judy, Nick, this is Serge.”

“Hi!” Judy exclaimed. “I’m so pleased to meet you. What do you do?”

“I’m a medical ambulance pilot,” Serge replied, golden eyes glimmering as he regarded the bunny before he looked down, shy. Clawhauser shuffled closer to him so he was nearly pressed against his side.

“That’s so cool!” Judy replied. “I’ve always wanted to fly! I wish Clawhauser had told me he had a pilot friend!” She was taken aback when Serge chortled.

“I’ll have to take you sometime,” Serge replied, watching Clawhauser. Behind their backs (and hidden from Judy's eyesight), Serge and Clawhauser’s tails twined. Nick almost laughed himself, trying to think of a way to tell his partner about the true nature of their relationship without making her look like a fool. “You ready to go, handsome?” Serge asked Clawhauser. Judy smiled.

“We’ll see you later,” Clawhauser told Judy. He and Serge joined hands and strolled away, murmuring quietly to one another.

“Wish you would treat me like they treat each other.” Judy said pensively, elbowing Nick gently in the ribs. Nick wanted to cry and/or laugh at her words because _if only he could_ and also  _she was still going off with this_. “They seem like such good friends.”

“Jeez, Carrots!” Nick huffed, exasperated, and then he broke down in giggles, covering his mouth as he tried to contain himself.

“What? What is it?” Judy exclaimed, looking around as though she would find the source of the joke. “Nick?”

Nick wiped a tear from his eye. “Carrots, they’re a _couple_.”

“What?” Judy’s eyes grew wide, and then she gasped. “Oh sweet cheese and crackers!” Her cheeks stained a dull red as she snorted and smacked herself in the forehead.

“‘Clawhauser’ was printed on his jumpsuit,” Nick informed her when she hid her face, shoulders shaking in laughter. “They were totally giving each other bedroom eyes. Clawhauser came toward Serge like he was magnetic. Their tails were so tightly wound I'm surprised they didn't snap off.”

“Come to think of it, there's a photo of a him and a tiger and two kits on his desk.” Judy groaned. “But I didn't think it was a family photo. I thought it was nieces and nephews and–I must've looked like such an idiot.”

“It's okay, Carrots,” Nick replied. “I mean, if you _really_ want me to treat you like they treat each other, your tail’s a little short, but we could make it work.” He tried not to let on that he was only half-kidding, grabbing his tail as though measuring the length of it.

Judy smirked, looking at her feet. “…I think mine's too small. I mean, yours is so long and…”

“…I don't want to know,” Officer McHorn muttered as he stamped past, obviously overhearing the tail end of their conversation (no pun intended). Nick laughed aloud.

“You know what I mean,” Judy snapped, but there was no bite in it. “Let’s go get your salmon, lover boy.”

“I can't be lover boy, you won't let me be,” Nick whined, but he followed her out the door and down the street anyway.


	2. When They Met

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Serge's days off aren't normally so hectic or full of promise.

Serge swept through the racks in JCPenguin’s medium-sized mammal section. Elvira, the other third to their set of triplets, led him to and fro, as Serge eyed the suits critically. Rupert was around here somewhere, probably sidetracked from clothes shopping in favor of chatting up the nearest animal with a pulse.

The mall was more packed this time of year—it was holiday season. Animals came to Bengalville to lie on the beaches and fawn over the ancient structures dotting the landscape. Unfortunately for the triplets, it was midsummer. At least they weren’t shopping in the bathing suit section, Serge thought with a shudder.

“Serge!” Elvira hissed. Serge made his way over to where she was hovering beside a display of dress pants. “You could try some of these.”

“I don’t wear blue dress pants, El,” Serge replied with a roll of his golden eyes.

“Well _excuse me_ ,” Elvira snapped, but there was no heat in it. “Who’s the one that wanted to go shopping on his day off?”

“I already wear blue _every day_ , why would I want to wear it in my free time?” Serge bickered good-naturedly. “I’m tired. And hungry.”

“We may as well leave, then. Where’s Rupert?” In sync, they perked up their ears, straining for Rupert’s deep voice.

“That way,” Serge sighed as soon as they picked up on their bother’s undeniable purr.

They moved through the store to find him by the checkout, crouched down and having an intimate conversation with a pig in a sundress. Serge wished his hearing wasn’t quite so keen; he could have lived his entire life not hearing what his brother said to attractive strangers.

“Ahem.” A large group of customers lingered about; a beaver in a polo shirt buying flip flops, a koala trying on sunglasses, a small group of cheetahs chattering as they waited in line with various clothing items, an elderly ram wiping his forehead in the heat of the day, and many more. They ones near enough to hear turned to look at Serge when he cleared his throat, and he shrunk a little inside at their gazes. “We’re leaving,” he said to Rupert with less enthusiasm, cursing himself and his shyness.

The old ram rubbed his chest, face puckered into a frown. It occurred to Serge that perhaps he was being rude in announcing their departure (with no purchases) in front of the bison and wolf employees running the register.

The ram bleated out in terror then, and Serge whipped around to face him.

“Are you alright?” Elvira asked. Rupert, lady pig forgotten, rushed to help, catching the ram as he pitched forward.

“Sir?”

“My chest,” the ram gasped, hooves pawing at his heart.

“Call 911,” Serge ordered Elvira. She whipped out her phone. “He might be having a heart attack. Lay him on his back.” Rupert carefully set the ram down and got out of the way as Serge kneeled by the ram’s side. “Does anyone have aspirin?” He demanded. The koala scrabbled with his bag. The ram was gasping. “You!” Serge pointed to the cheetahs. “Give me those! Make him comfortable!” The koala produced a tiny bottle of aspiring and tossed it to Serge.

“Chew this,” he told the ram as several cheetahs propped up the ram’s head with clothing and tucked them around him. The ram chewed desperately. Another cheetah stooped down on the other side of the ram, offering his paw. The ram took it, squeezing as he chewed and swallowed and gasped for air.

“It’s gonna be okay,” the cheetah murmured.

“They’re on their way,” Elvira informed them, and then the ram lost consciousness.

“Damn it!” Serge cursed. He loomed over the ram’s chest and began to administer CPR.

The following silence was deafening. Serge could hear the heavy breathing of the panicked animals, but other than that no one made a sound. His pulse roared as he gunned his clenched paws up and down on the ram’s chest. The cheetah holding the ram’s hoof didn’t let go, holding on as though the ram was an anchor.

The ambulance arrived just when Serge thought his shoulders were going to give out. He nodded to the EMTs; he knew them well. They lifted the ram up and onto a stretcher. The cheetah released his hoof as they pulled him out the door and onto the ambulance.

Serge sat back on his haunches, closing his eyes.

“Even a hero on his day off,” Rupert muttered, but Serge could hear the pride in his voice. Serge lifted his head to look at the cheetah that had decided to comfort the ram.

Oh no.

The cheetah hefted himself to his feet and, smiling kindly, offered Serge a paw up. He took it.

The gathered crowd broke into wild applause, Elvira cheering the loudest of all. Serge determinedly did not look at them. He wanted to die. Instead he inclined his head their way, the closest to acknowledgement they were going to get. Serge had never trained in emergency medical for the glory. He did it because he was good at it and he wanted to help people.

Belatedly he realized he was still holding the cheetah’s paw as the hustle of the store resumed and dropped it quickly. “Thanks,” he told him. Serge tried to meet the cheetah’s smiling brown eyes for longer than a few seconds but had to look away, blushing. The cheetah was definitely attractive, especially with that lovely smile.

Oh _no_.

“You’re welcome!” the cheetah beamed again, radiant as the sun, and Serge was just about blinded. He could hear Elvira’s snort and Rupert’s muffled snicker somewhere behind him. “So you’re trained? What do you do?”

“I’m an air ambulance pilot,” Serge replied, shuffling his feet, but he smiled through the awkwardness.

“That’s so cool!” the cheetah touched his arm. Serge almost gasped and he looked into the cheetah’s face again. It was full of respect and admiration.

“Hey,” Rupert appeared at Serge’s side. “I’m Rupert, this is Serge, that’s Elvira,” he pointed behind them where Elvira waved. “What’s your name?”

“Benjamin Clawhauser, ZPD,” the cheetah replied, then gasped. “Sorry, I keep forgetting I’m on vacation.”

“Oh, you’re from Zootopia!” Serge blurted. He stared at Benjamin’s face until the cheetah gave him yet another gentle smile, and- _oh no_ …

“Yes, I am,” Benjamin said, and it looked like he was blushing.

“That’s cool, dude,” Rupert smiled. “Now why don’t you give my brother your number so you guys can discuss that in detail tomorrow night at six o’clock?”

Oh, Rupert was _dead_.

“That sounds great!” Benjamin chirped, thrusting his phone into Serge’s paws. Serge tapped in his number, heart rate starting to pick up of its vocation. He hadn’t been on a real date in forever, let alone with someone he had felt so drawn to- “You probably know all the local places, my cousins will be _so_ excited-”

Ah. Serge deflated. But then he looked up into Benjamin’s eyes, and for perhaps the first time in his life thought _screw it_.

“I was actually thinking it would just be you and me,” Serge replied, and Benjamin’s eyes opened wide.

“Oh.” Then he smiled. “ _Oh_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is totally unedited, let me know if i screwed up somewhere.  
> oh god i'm so sorry about this fluffy plotless crap omfg.  
> ...there may be more to come tho.

**Author's Note:**

> I have seen this movie 5 times now in the theater and I am still not over it. I think it's becoming a problem.  
> Also, I might write more little snippets about Serge and Clawhauser because I am weak willed and eager to please.


End file.
